Family day out at Hort Park

Today is a Saturday, and a beginning of a long weekend as the coming Monday is a public holiday. My colleagues had organized a family day outing for the department at the Hort Park on this day. I had two minds about taking part as I was unsure if I could summon enough positive energy to set myself into the right mood for the occasion. It would dampen spirits if I could not hide my grieving and turned up looking melancholic. On similar occasions in the past, Jenny would be almost always join me so the thought of going alone this time was a dismal one. But I was the head of the team and there is always an air of expectation of support from the boss. What excuse should I turn in without invoking sympathy from subordinates? They would in all likelihood understand if I had chosen not to go but I would risk making myself an object of pity.  So for much of the weeks leading to the event I found myself wishy-washy, stuck in a state of dilemma.

At the end I pushed all my apprehensions aside and registered for the event but with the plan to go alone. It would be unlikely for any of any colleagues to be so foolishly bold and insensitive to ask why I was coming alone as they are all too aware of my wife's recent demise. Still I was prepping myself for awkward questions to which I would stoically reply that I see my wonderful colleagues who are ever so caring and supportive as an extended  "family"!

Somehow, throughout the week I have not discussed about this event with my children. I just could not picture them relishing the idea of waking up early on a Saturday morning to take part in such company organised events. It will be totally uncharacteristic of them. Period, so no point asking even.

But I was clearly wrong. Except for my boy who had work engagement, when my two daughters learnt of my "go solo" plan on the the night before, to my very pleasant surprise they both insisted on joining in. And there will be no issue about waking up early.

So the family day event turned up very good for everyone.  The anxiety about having to go single that troubled me was totally needless. The two girls interacted with my colleagues, played with their kids and enjoyed the day as much too, in particular the walk up on the canopy that led to the top of Kent Ridge. While I still missed the company of my beloved wife on an occasion such as this, my two daughters were making clear and conscious effort to help fill in for her, sparing me the ordeal of attending alone, after all this was a family day event.

I must learn not to take such tender mercies for granted. In any case, a good deed should not go unrewarded so lunch treat from their old man would be at a restaurant of their choosing. We lunched at a korean eatery at HillV2 and returned home after that, tired but overall quite happy.